Bad Fiction Writers Go To Congress

Pamela and Todd have covered this below, but the statement that Larry Craig released this afternoon is such a shameless and transparent lie that it deserves special attention. (Please don’t tell the “Congressional Potato” about it.)

Good fiction writing gets you on the bestseller list. (Hopefully). Bad fiction writing, evidently, gets you into Congress.

Alberto, move over! There’s a NEW contender for most shameless pathetic liar in Washington, D.C. Within a DAY of Gonzales’ resignation, convicted sex-offender Senator Larry Craig of Idaho, pleading complete cluelessness about how the law actually works, served up this whopper:

ABC News reprints Craig’s statement
(And here it is on his Senate website)

I did nothing wrong at the Minneapolis airport. I regret my decision to plead guilty and the sadness that decision has brought to my wife, family, friends, staff, and fellow Idahoans. For that I apologize.

In June, I overreacted and made a poor decision. While I was not involved in any inappropriate conduct at the Minneapolis airport or anywhere else, I chose to plead guilty to a lesser charge in the hope of making it go away. I did not seek any counsel, either from an attorney, staff, friends, or family. That was a mistake, and I deeply regret it … As I mentioned earlier, I have now retained counsel to examine this matter and I will make no further comment.”

Oh: ‘Now that I have a lawyer, I won’t talk about it’? (Leave aside the admission of perjury: making a sworn statement admitting to a crime that one supposedly didn’t commit is a crime, as well, but hey, what’s “truth” after all? Right?)

‘I’m sorry for pleading GUILTY’?!? ‘I was innocent, but I didn’t think to get a lawyer and pled guilty to a crime of moral turpitude because I HAD NO IDEA HOW THE LAW WORKS’?!!!?!?!?!? (Even though I MAKE the laws?)

Now, I may not be a lawyer, but I still remember my ‘Criminal Practice and Procedure’ class at TCU, wherein the Dallas County Assistant District Attorney (the non-elective “professional” in the office who taught the course) told us, “No matter WHAT it costs you, or how long it takes, always fight any accusation of a crime of moral turpitude to the bitter end.”

And a generation of “streakers” learned that lesson, some painfully.

Don’t tell me that Larry Craig was so clueless that he didn’t know this. Nobody in their right mind pleads guilty to such a charge without understanding the profound implications of even a misdemeanor on their record. Surrounded by a sea of lawyers, Craig never asked anybody about it? Are you kidding me?

(Of course you are. Larry Craig is lying like a cheap rug. And only a network news anchor can’t see it.)

Well, Senator Craig proudly brags on his site that he sits on many caucuses, including the “Congressional Potato,” but, perhaps, after this the Potato Caucus might not be so hot to brag about Larry Craig.

Meantime, Editor & Publisher asks: “How Did News Outlets Miss Senator’s Arrest for Nearly Three Months?

By Joe Strupp
Published: August 28, 2007 1:38 PM ET

NEW YORK The revelation late Monday that Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) was arrested nearly three months ago for allegedly making sexual advances in a men’s room raises the issue of how such an action could occur without the press reporting it.

Even Roll Call reporter John McArdle, who broke the story late Monday, admits he only received word of the arrest and subsequent guilty plea via a tip last week.

“You would think in the 24-hour news cycle, something like this would slip through,” said McArdle, a four-year veteran of the Capitol Hill daily. “He wanted to keep it quiet, and he almost got away with it.”

Even more surprising is that the unreported arrest occurred at a time when Craig was under scrutiny following previous allegations of gay relationships and sexual advances dating back to late 2006, when a blogger accused Craig of having relationships with men. The conservative senator has long denied the allegations….

Must be that “liberal bias” that Hannity and the Drooling Wingnuts chew the carpet about so often.

I suppose in light of the new revelations about Sen. Craig, this photo might require a new caption:

Your caption here.

It will be fascinating to see how Hannity & Faux spin this, how the issue somehow morphs into “gay rights” debates, and how the blatant nature of this all gets swept under the rug. Larry Craig got caught engaging in lewd conduct in a public restroom. That’s a crime. Sexual orientation isn’t the issue: a “moral’ Republican senator whose voting record on “moral” issues IS.

Unless being in the GOP is a “Get Out of the 10 Commandments FREE” card. Looking at Giuliani, Gingrinch (sic) and the other “moral” bastards running, perhaps it is.


Bookmark and Share

About Hart Williams

Mr. Williams grew up in Wyoming, Nebraska, Kansas and New Mexico. He lived in Hollywood, California for many years. He has been published in The Washington Post, The Kansas City Star, The Santa Fe Sun, The Los Angeles Free Press, Oui Magazine, New West, and many, many more. A published novelist and a filmed screenwriter, Mr. Williams eschews the decadence of Hollywood for the simple, wholesome goodness of the plain, honest people of the land. He enjoys Luis Buñuel documentaries immensely.
Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed.