The Jackbooting of the Fraidy Cats (with video)

The vapors” continue in a land sadly bereft of fainting couches.

Scaredy Cat Erickson

Well, that asinine hiring by CNN of Erick Erickson, salaried wingnut extraordinaire, is finally paying off, in spades:

Today, CNN featured a story centering around CNN contributor and RedState managing editor Erick Erickson*the latest victim in a series of incidents …

… on his own radio show, Erickson played a recording of the 911 call that triggered the visit from law enforcement to his home.  He went on to describe the series of events that occurred on the evening of May 27th.  As he discussed the recent letters sent by Georgia Senator Saxby Chambliss and Texas Congressman Kenny Marchant calling on the Department of Justice to investigate the SWATting incidents, Erickson announced a breaking development regarding Congressional actions:

I have been told that Monday, the House of Representatives will engage on this and seventy or more members will formally be sending a letter to Eric Holder, asking him on behalf of these members of the house to also get the FBI involved….

[* Note how his part time gig is UP FRONT, while his employment by Tom Phillips (Regnery Press, Eagle Publishing, Phillips Foundation, American Spectator, RedState blog) is downplayed. We need this to be a NATIONAL, LEGITIMATE story, and not the paranoic ravings of a Robert Stacy “Undisclosed Location” McCain “meetoo” drama queen.]

Horrors! Fetch me my fan and parasol! I feel … feel … ohhhhh!

[Sound of a limp body thudding onto the floor.] What great “journalist” has managed to turn “I have been told” into a HARD NEWS FACT? That was the incredibly brave pseudonymous “Liberty Chick” writing for Breitbart dot com QUOTING “Breitbart News,” reporting on Erickson’s self-serving statement on his Atlanta, Georgia AM radio show.

Or so we’ve been led to believe …

And you will notice how completely insular and “in-group” it all is until Erickson WALKS it into CNN in Atlanta.

After a week of desperately trying to create a “controversy,” they have FINALLY succeeded in breaking down the firewall between real news and whatever it is that they’re having the conniption fits/heebie jeebies/ howling moonbattery about. Look at me! Look at me! I’m a VICTIM! I’m a VICTIM!  (Quoth the ravin’: evermore).

(And, of course, it’s a great way to kill any news about the Netroots Nation convention this weekend and set up for the Conservative Political Action Conference, CPAC, wingding next week.)

This strange “whatshisname” high tech lynching continues, now virtually guaranteed to break through the media firewall against self-indulgent, manufactured lunacy and get the “wots all this then?” treatment from the Press Corpse.

Seriously, have ever a bunch of bullies ever acted like such pussies? The single-greatest purchase in Wingnut Land today is surely Koch Industries’ Northern Towels*, for sopping up all the urine that’s leaked out onto the floor.

Dixie cups are also a wholly-owned subsidiary
of Koch Industries. 

[* Note: If you click the link, you’ll get a pretty good anecdotal history of corporate mergers in the XXIst Century.]

And the blogosmear goes CRAZY (shrieking their “silence” for a second straight day):


Lance Burri / The TrogloPundit: A few words about “Spoofing” and “SWATting,” and would it matter to you if somebody got killed?
The Lonely Conservative: 70 Members of Congress to Call for Investigation Into the SWATting of Bloggers
Susan Duclos / Wake up America: Listen To SWATting 911 Call- Now Report Says 70 House Members Will Call For DOJ Investigation
Alex Alvarez / Mediaite: CNN’s Don Lemon Questions Erick Erickson About ‘Swatting’ Attacks On Conservative Bloggers

“ignorance and fear”

And they have LITERALLY made a federal case out of it. It?

And WHAT is IT that’s got everyone in such a bedwetting, night-terrors frenzy? Let Senator Saxby “Morphin bin Laden” Chambliss (R, Loon Lake) explain this EARTH SHATTERING THREAT to Faux Nooz’  Breit Bohre:

Watch on YouTube

Yes, that’s right. Three prank phone calls have the entire rightiesphere AND (allegedly) seventy members of congress (although, as of this writing, only two have come forward, Chambliss of Georgia and a Tea Party Caucus congresscritter from Texas).

They’ve even attributed the FBI with their coinage, “SWATting,” which means calling the SWAT team, as opposed to calling the police or calling the fire department, or having fifty pizzas delivered. This tactic is no more than a sophistication of the old trick of filling a brown paper bag with fresh dog feces, putting it on the porch, lighting it on fire, ringing the doorbell and running like hell. (And trying not to laugh so hard that you give away your position when the shocked homeowner tries to stomp out the fire.)

THREE incidents.


The irony, of course, is that IF the SWAT team does their job professionally, it’s no worse than any other senseless phone prank. It’s a misdemeanor, of course, but people still do it. If anybody’s life is in danger, THAT’s the fault of putting an insane amount of armament in the hands of jerks and fools, and having paramilitary troops quartered in our towns in the first place.

Why, to protect us from
crazed socialists, of course! 

Where I live, in Liberal Wonderland, they once sent our SWAT team to the park to deal with a case of public masturbation. (The offender thought it was private.) Now, either that’s a symptom of a much deeper malaise in our society, else bears silent testimony to the prodigious size of the offender’s organ.

But three (and perhaps now FOUR) prank phone calls, no matter WHO made them — your granny or Charlie Manson, it doesn’t matter — are NOT cause for a national wave of fear, nor are they a legitimate news story, nor are those who accuse me of engaging in some kind of “conspiracy theory” about this playing with a full deck — since, for this story to work, a “conspiracy” has to have committed these three or acts of juvenile provocation.

Remember: they can only tie this whatshisname fellow to ONE or, perhaps TWO incidents. So, you don’t have a pattern, without some mental contortions of the most paranoid kind.

So, they are going to try and force prank phone calls (that you can count on the fingers of one hand and have fingers left over) into Federal Case? Into a NATIONAL SCANDAL OF EPIC PROPORTIONS, with complete domination of the Memeorandum front page TWO successive Fridays in a row?

Well, good luck with that. Our national “legitimate” media are just about dumb enough to do JUST that.

Media: Wot’s all this then?

Already they’ve intimidated at least one leftie blogger into a blanket denunciation of whatshisname, seemingly just in case she is conflated or somehow tarred with this awful, awful phone pranking.

Meanwhile, Erick Erickson cries bitter tears into his pillow each night as he sobs in uncontrollable fear.

It’s hard to remember how “macho” and gung ho these selfsame blogs were, when it came to intimidating all war protest or questioning of The Fearless Leader and his jihad against First Amendment Rights.

Ann Coulter shamelessly pays homage to “hero” McCarthy

Oh wait: scratch a bully, find a coward.

Michelle MalkinBloggers under fire: Arizona conservative lawyer/activist targeted by left-wing Arizona State Bar  —  I’ve turned the lights back on here at after “going dark” to help raise awareness about attacks on blogger free speech.  Every phone call, e-mail, tweet …

I am told there are now up to 83 congressional representatives [emphasis Malkin’s] who have signed their names to a letter — demanding “thorough examination at every level” of these terroristic crimes and threats — that will be sent to Attorney General Eric Holder on Monday. And I can tell you there’s much more in the works. At every level….

Why did this happen to the dedicated, outspoken, and unapologetically conservative young lawyer? Her nightmare has all the makings of a partisan political vendetta and witch hunt….

Yeah. First bombers making prank phone calls and now the “left wing” Arizona State Bar is “targeting bloggers” (because, as we all know, Arizona is a hotbed of liberalism and ALL the attorneys in Arizona are liberals, since virtually all the lawyers in Arizona belong to the state bar association.)

My ghod! It’s a liberal conspiracy to murder and destroy all Conservative Bloggers!! The very FREEDOM TO BLOG is at stake (as one paranoid, hyperbolic fantasist put it)!!!!!   Bwahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Oh, and if that doesn’t work, it’s also EVERYBODY’S bipartisan issue. Which makes madness sound so much more reasonable, n’est ce pas?]

Have ever a more craven batch of schoolyard bullies wept crocodile tears so large?

Rubber pillowcases are in high demand right now. Get yours before the prices go up.


UPDATE: This was posted a day before, predictably, THIS blogswarm showed up on Memeorandum. Note that virtually the entire Tea Party Caucus signed the letter. I must be a prophet.


A writer, published author, novelist, literary critic and political observer for a quarter of a quarter-century more than a quarter-century, Hart Williams has lived in the American West for his entire life. Having grown up in Wyoming, Kansas and New Mexico, a survivor of Texas and a veteran of Hollywood, Mr. Williams currently lives in Oregon, along with an astonishing amount of pollen. He has a lively blog His Vorpal Sword. This is cross-posted from his blog

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About Hart Williams

Mr. Williams grew up in Wyoming, Nebraska, Kansas and New Mexico. He lived in Hollywood, California for many years. He has been published in The Washington Post, The Kansas City Star, The Santa Fe Sun, The Los Angeles Free Press, Oui Magazine, New West, and many, many more. A published novelist and a filmed screenwriter, Mr. Williams eschews the decadence of Hollywood for the simple, wholesome goodness of the plain, honest people of the land. He enjoys Luis Buñuel documentaries immensely.
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